The First Time


Way the ocean walks on a dry sand for the first time

Once upon a time,
sitting under the spell of solace
I tried to meet myself
in presence of a crimson shade.

Heart asked me a question,
what does it feel like
the connection – the union,
the essence of the “First Time”?

How do you feel the vibe?
how you know the signs?
Which turn to take you know,
which moves are right?

I traveled,
thinking on this for long,
from lands of wonder
to lands forlorn.
Keeping a question of union in mind,
a journey made alone.
Answer to question this perplexing
was still unknown.

Is it smooth, caressing, absorbing and soothing?
Way hands made to hold each other cling after yearning,
Way the ocean walks on a dry sand for first time…

Is it majestic, spell-binding, transitive, and arching?
Way the eyes shine reading the face of the beloved,
Way the new born child smiles for the first time…

Is it startling, surprising, appealing and awe-inspiring?
Way a lover begins to comprehend the words unsaid,
Way a magic trick’s secret is revealed for the first time…

Is it ecstatic, relieving, mesmerizing, and bewitching?
Way a lover marches into the realm of fantasies,
Way one sights the rainbow after a rainfall first time…

Is it rejuvenating, relaxing, liberating and elevating?
Way lovers unite with each other under the moon-light,
Way two spirits embrace each other for the first time…

Is it shining, alluring, captivating, and bewildering?
Way a new world – new star, new place to live is discovered,
Way young bird sees sky to take a flight for the first time…

Or Is it dancing, whirling, waving and conquering?
Way two colors mix into each other, without an apparent line,
Day the beloved claims, “you’re mine” for the first time…

I was looking into these experiences,
and then I looked in my hand
the message you parted with…
“The way you see me intensely,
your gaze infiltrates me like a first time,
the way it stays fixed,
like you’re seeing me for the last time”.

That helped me describe,
the way I feel…
the way an unseen bond,
unplanned connection,
a union does feel like…

It’s not like the first time at all.
it is quite contrary,
It’s like the lost pieces of a puzzle
were supposed to come along,
in each other’s embrace…
like having known each other
for all-time.

Thanks to you,
I realized this today
for the very first time.

– Dedicated to that feeling of union – a connection felt very first time.


Gazing me intensely, like a first time, like a last time…

Image Credits:
1. Screen cap from “The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012)” –
2. Poster image from “The First Time (2012)” –

20 thoughts on “The First Time

  1. Every time I read your new post, I fall in love with your words. They are woven so beautifully together. Every word pulls at my heart strings.. Every phrase wreaks havoc with my emotions, and every stanza blows me away with its exquisiteness. You are truly gifted.

  2. More than the words which you are master at, its your thought and the feeling that is so unknown and yet known, undiscovered and yet just discovered, has left me with a surrealistic feeling, something that resembles my dream.
    I read this all over again while watching the morning star and both are just equally effulgent – to me at least it is.

    • First time someone has praised my accidental in so vivid detail without even mentioning a name…
      Way a person of supreme faith would do a good deed without caring of any reward or an acknowledgement.
      Thank you… 🙂

  3. People speak of fate
    and meetings of chance.
    Finding of soul mates
    and love at first glance.

    Alignment of planets
    Shooting stars up above.
    Fullness of the moon
    and pairs of white doves.

    I’ve never taken stock
    in these symbols and signs.
    But having met you
    proved I’d been blind.

    Poets write of hearts
    eternal devotion.
    Flames of desire
    and new found emotion.

    Love ever lasting
    a lifetime of bliss.
    Heaven here on Earth
    the passion of a kiss.

    I’ve never found valid
    these words foolishly penned.
    Then you graced my presence
    and proved me wrong again.

    Singers sing of heartache
    and the one that got away.
    Internal emptiness
    pain that still remains.

    Missed opportunities
    the hollowness of night.
    Paths that never cross
    timing that wasn’t right.

    I never dreamed those songs
    could ever ring so true.
    Until I thought of life
    without ever knowing you.

    – Ryan Mapes –

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